Saturday, March 10, 2012

Just Like That..

More than half a year of high-schoolish bliss. More than half a year of a non-defined, non-conventional, borderline lovers & friends sorta, kinda, type of a relationship.. Like most good things, it came to an end. The wonders brought about by a non-committal, semi-labeled fling. One of those is maturity. Being mature in the sense of being content in whatever you have, or what you don’t. Mainly because, just the thought of making it “official” will either transform you into a monster, or just bring it out of you, unwillingly. And of course, you can’t afford to lose it that way, not again. That is just scary as hell.

Having fun, enjoying each other’s company, increased nicotine intake, the never-ending rants & raves, the jargons that only the two of you can make sense of, the countless laughs, the alcohol-triggered tears.. No demands, minimal stress, less the bullshit. It would’ve been the most ideal relationship for a middle-aged drama queen. But then again, like most good things, it came to an end.

As I prepare myself to embark on a new journey, I wish not to take a lot of baggage. However, how can you just throw something out the window, when you know for a fact that you were in a state of utter delight when you had it? I guess it wouldn’t hurt to carry this little purse of happiness with me. I guess, someday, I’ll be able to just pile it in my closet of memories. But for now, please allow me to hold on to it. Closely. I choose not to grieve. Grief is just for losing people in a sad, inevitable way. I prefer to just allow the wave of nostalgia take me away. Though there will be tears, for sure it’s because of joy, and not otherwise.

As I put my stilettos on & walk through my road of life, there’s nothing left to do but bid goodbye.. & smile. That we have crossed paths, even if it was just for a short while..

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